As I am celebrating my 50th birthday this year, I am looking at Valentine’s Day a little differently. This year it is all about me and self-love. Being my own soul mate. I am really looking at myself for who I am and I am embracing both my strengths and weaknesses, with all my imperfections in all their glory. So, here are a few things that I just LOVE and that make ME happy (and perhaps you too?):

	Heart Pendant Necklace – Nothing says love more than a heart symbol, but this necklace states it in a big way. Talk about putting your heart out there! Available in either recycled aluminum or recycled copper from AriaHandmade. $45.00
	Valentine Hankies – When I think of hankies I think of the pile of vintage hankies my mother lovingly kept from her parents and grandparents. There is something quite nostalgic and romantic about handkerchiefs and it appears they are making a comeback. They are better for our environment but also, they are quite beautiful and add a touch of personal style. LuRay Hankies design a lovely bouquet of vintage inspired handkerchiefs. Great to wrap a gift in for a lovely touch. See all her designs at LuRayHankies. $6.50
	A Ring of Roses Buttercream – Nothing says self-love than a luxurious bath. Ahhhh. And why not buy roses for yourself – Rose soap that is! The soap pairs rosewater and cocoa butter to help soften and pamper your skin while you bathe. Now that is what I am talking about! Buy directly from LUSH. $9.95
	Spun Silk Sheets - There is nothing more luxurious than sleeping in soft-like-butter sheets. These silk sheets are not so silky that you’ll slip off, but rather more cotton-like in their feel. However, because they are silk, they are extremely breathable (hot flash friendly) and are anti-bacterial. And they may even help with my insomnia. Oh, and I am sure my husband will love them also! Buy from VivaTerra. $175.00
	His and Her L.O.V.E. T-Shirts – And not to leave my husband out, because I truly would not be who I am without him, here is a pair of adorably romantic T-shirts. Beautifully stated because my love would not be complete without him. Buy from this Etsy Artist here. $34.95

You know when you come across something that gives you such a sweet feeling? Well, Hook-Links did this to me. It brought me back to when I was younger (much younger), when my best friend Keri and I were inseparable. We lived within a short walking distance from each other and when we were not together, we were on the phone talking for hours! (I wish I could go back in time and listen to those phone calls.) We slept and ate at each others homes, we did sports together and even joined each others family vacations. What I remember the most fondly about our time together is that we laughed – a lot!

Today, I see young girls, like Keri and I used to do, hold hands while walking as they laugh, talk and use the entire width of the sidewalk as they move back and forth pressing into each other. Ahhh…Memories…. Keri and I would have worn Hook-Links magnetic friendship bracelets if they had been around when we were younger. These silicon magnetic bracelets come in five different colors and stick together when holding each others hand.  As you know, opposites attract and this goes for magnets also. Each bracelet has an engraved and embossed logo on each side that contains opposite magnetic charges, so you can always connect together.

The bracelets are the very symbol of friendship and togetherness. Which make them perfect, of course, for young loves also and a great gift idea for Valentine’s Day.

Hook-Links bracelets can be purchased in small, medium and large size, on the Hook-Links website or on Amazon for $14.99. A great gift for kids, tweens, teens and adults alike to join in on a community that sticks together and a perfect symbol for Valentine’s Day.

Keri and I are still best of friends. We no longer live down the street from each other but, when we do see each other, we still laugh and hold hands as we sway back and forth taking up the entire sidewalk.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Well, here’s a company that is making genealogy look fresh and sexy! Just like the people on the family tree branches were at one time – or the tree wouldn’t exist. the company is called My Tree & Me and it designs and modernizes genealogy charts.

It’s easy to order: Choose a design (keep in mind that various designs accommodate various branches of the tree and different levels of generation), fill out the genealogy form, approve the proof and you’ll receive the beautiful genealogy chart within 3 to 4 weeks.

What a great gift idea for a wedding, a baby gift or a milestone birthday. It’s a truly one-of-kind graphic interpretation of someone’s history, a personal piece of art that, as My Tree & Me states,  “inspires curiosity, reminiscing, and storytelling”.

Prices range from $55 to $120. The choice includes photo trees and a DIY version too. Shop at MyTreeandMe.com.

Love it.

The beginning of a new year, ahhh, a time for fresh starts and new fresh energy. Time to move forward with grace and improved health, strength and vitality. The holidays were a time to indulge, and did we enjoy that! Now we have a choice to implement new healthy habits. It’s time to take exquisite care of ourselves, really show lots more self love.

It’s a time for reflection as winter draws us into this special time of year. The days are shorter, the weather gets colder. Your body really needs some nourishment right now. So, what can you do?

I believe in adding in new practices and then the old habits and patterns melt away. January and February’s snowy (or rainy!) days and nights beckon for hot baths, a cup a tea, a little nap. Our bodies need nourishing especially in winter. Warm soups, stews, a little 10 minute break here and there…..these all so simply nourishing to your body, mind and spirit. Notice how you really feel after taking care of You!

Upon rising, try enjoying a large glass of filtered water with a squeeze of lemon or lime, some grated ginger, and add a dash of cayenne pepper: fire water! You re-hydrate after sleep, refresh and warm yourself with ginger for circulation and its anti- inflammatory qualities, and the cayenne wakes up your digestion! This practice is very energizing, try it for a week and notice how you feel.

I received a beautiful new year’s card with some inspiration I’d like to share with you:

Thoughts for a Happy and Successful 2012

Plant a tree for your birthday
Don’t postpone joy
Demand excellence and be willing to pay for it
Don’t take your good health for granted
Think big thoughts, but relish small pleasures
Be kinder than necessary
Take time to look at the stars
Swing for the fence
Live life as an exclamation, not an explanation
Reread a favorite book
Do things in the order of their importance
Leave everything a little better than you found it

Have a joyful, energized and healthy 2012!

Questions? Email me at Margaret [at] FocusedWisdom.com for more health inspiration and ideas!

You may be familiar with the Eden Fantasys adult shop – or maybe not. If you are, you are probably familiar with their titillating props. What you may not know is their large selection of romantic products for couples. Products like massage kits such as the Knead Me Massage Set or the Don’t Stop Massage Candle. Both create a romantic ambiance and warm massage oil for a memorable evening and an unbelievable back rub (speaking from personal experience, ahem!).

If you are planning a getaway and want to make it more sensual, you may want to look at the classic Karma Sutra Getaway Kit or the let’s-get-it-on Leau A Deux Kit. Both are beautifully packaged with all the right paraphernalia to make your weekend escape more amorous, intimate and relaxing.

And of course, if you want to look the part and play the part there are also some sexy choices of Lingerie.

Check out Eden Fantasys and receive 20% off your entire order when using coupon code TSW20. Also you can follow them to get news of new playful product on Facebook, Twitter and Google+.

The Snapi is a clamshell-like spring-loaded claw that makes picking up, well, practically anything easy, with a single hand, a whole serving with just one scoop.

I first tried it on all the items below (and then some) and am now using it as my favorite server. Sure, it’s not very chic (though it’s quite cute), but my beautifully designed salad servers just can’t pick up the salad and all its chopped lil’ bits like the Snappi can. It is great to pick the still hot French fries, to maneuver the rotini pasta into the plate… If you have younger children, they will love to use it to pile veggies on their plate (now getting to eat them is another matter…). It would also be great to use on picnics, tailgates and buffets.

The Snapi is made in the U.S.A. from food-safe polymers with a grippy rubber surface; it’s dishwasher safe and shuts close for drawer storage.

Buy directly from the company, KitchenHappy.com or from Amazon for about $6.95.

Do you want to add a bit of amore in your relationship? Just think that every month you both could receive a sexy pair of intimates, model them for each other and  enjoy the rest of the evening together, nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

Here are some Intimates of the Month Club to surely inspire romance in your relationship…

FOR HER
	Panty by Post – Although this is a Canadian company, it actually started in Paris, which explains the French flair in their lingerie offering. Their goal is bring back nostalgia of receiving something pretty, sexy and completely feminine in the mail every month. Each panty comes beautifully packaged with a personal message from the sender. Choose from hipster, thong, bikini and vintage or a mix of all. Now this is a way to say Je t’aime!  Check out the Panty by Post website. Do you know anyone one soon to be married? They also have a special club for the bride and groom. What a way to start off a marriage!
	Panty Fairy – Another panty-of-the-month club for those who love surprises. The recipient never knows what will be in those monthly packages until they arrive. One month they could be lacy French knickers and the next, a blue satin thong. Choose between a 6 month and 12 month subscription on the Panty Fairy website.
	Chocolates Fantasies - A panty of the month club that will surely spice things up. Each monthly gift (if it is a holiday month the package will have a holiday theme to it) will include a pair of panties, chocolates, edible undies, chocolate body sauce or rose and a personalized note.  You’re thus guaranteed at least one amorous night a month. Ooh la la. They also offer a sexy bra & panty set monthly club. Check out their website here.
	In the Mood Intimates - This is a panty of the month club “on a budget”. Your loved one can still show they love you with this three month panty club, with brand names like Chantelle, Hanky Panky, and Panache, to name a few. Choose from bikini/boyshort or thong/g-string and the company will look after the rest, including doing a holiday theme on the appropriate months. Check out their reduced priced clubs here.
FOR HIM
	Panty by Post for Men – Men do not need to feel left out. We ladies can also send the man in our life a thoughtful, beautifully packaged gift, complete with a romantic note. Every month, he will get a pair of boxer briefs that are comfortable, soft, sexy and good for the planet (made of natural fibers). Just think, each month you can have a private fashion show for each other. Comme c’est romantique! Shop at Panty by Post, the Men section.
	ChocolateFantasies – This spicy site also has a Guy’s Club with treats. Every month he can expect a sexy pair of underwear, chocolates, edible undies, chocolate sauce or rose and more, all in a beautifully wrapped package with a personalized note. Talk about getting him in the mood! Shop here.

Yes, we know. You’re quite welcome.

It’s January 25, do you know where your resolution is?

Mine is happening right now as my little fingers fly (poke) over the keyboard of my hand-me-down laptop; Resolution 2012, more writing.

Only took 25 days to get crackin’.

Do you know that almost half of all Americans make a New Year’s Resolution and by June, more than half of those folks are still sticking with it?

Astounding and Huzzah!

The magic seems to be to not make goals along the lines of: I will lose 25 pounds by February 1 or I will never drink again, but rather to approach the clean slate of a new calendar year with more open possibilities such as, I will move more over the next 12 months or, cocktails are a weekend treat… see the difference? The more rigid and extreme, the greater the chance for failure.

Which is why, on the last day of 2011, I decided to forgo my usual blather about trekking Machu Pichu and simply aim to do more of the one thing that I actually want to do more of: write.

I need to write because of what is happening Chez Fast. The oldest child is a freshman in high school, the middle child is in the 8th grade and the youngest is in 2nd but let’s be honest, she is really more of a short adult than actual child so the bottom line is all of my wee babies are so not wee babies and I have been actively mourning the loss of their non-baby status for close to five months to the point where I have been banned from even looking at any pre-2010 photos because my maudlin state makes me weepy and then dinner is late…

And where I am going with this you ask? I am going straight into needing some documentation of my busy life which goes by much too quickly and I need to set things down so when I am an old woman I can look back and remember these precious, precious days before my kids had the nerve to grow up and get their own lives.

That is actually another little know trick of resolution success: mania.

I am asking you all for help. Help me stay focused. Once a month I will be here, Succulent-ing for your pleasure, but give me feedback and let me know what you want to hear about… for example, who among you needs tips when dealing with a first year high schooler with a senior girlfriend? I can help!

I would love to know how you are doing on your goals for 2012. Have you stuck with them or perhaps revised them? And more importantly, what motivated you and can we help you?

Is there better, thoroughly classic way of showing your undying love than with a dozen roses? Unfortunately, they last such a short time that they quickly start looking like your ‘dying’ love. Well, here’s a set of dozen roses that will not only live forever but that can also be worn as a LOVEly fashion statement! (OK, we’ll stop with the lovies now).

This String of Roses Silk Scarf is made with 100% natural silk that is weaved on antique looms to weave the richest quality fabric possible. All scarves are handmade and hand-dyed in Vietnam by skilled artisans who use ancient methods to produce the natural silk fibers. Each rose is individually crafted, so no two are exactly alike. The scarves are a work of art that are rich in color and soft to the touch.

Forget the long stem roses that will die in a week. Imagine that each time the scarf embraces her, she will think of the person who gave it to her (OK, we’re really done now).

This gorgeous scarf can be purchased here for $34.99. Contact Lua for a list of retailers near you.

It was the day after Christmas. I stopped in the grocery store to pick up some necessities and was confronted with the Season of Love.

Giant pink and red hearts filled the aisle. I was surrounded by heart candies and heart cards and everything one would need to create the Season of Love. And yet, what is truly needed to create love in your life doesn’t come in a box, bag or card. It comes from within.

Most relationships fail because we are looking to that individual to complete us, to fill an empty hole that was created by some wound or painful experience. If you are interested in creating a new season of love, a relationship that is based on a solid foundation and in any relationship you are yourself, well here are my suggestions.

Take Time To Feel Complete and Whole

The truth is that you are complete and whole. The truth is that you are perfect just the way you are and in knowing and feeling this you won’t try to change yourself or anyone while in a relationship. Here’s my suggested exercise (and I will admit it is a tough one).

Look in the mirror each day and state out loud the following, while looking yourself in the eye.

• I am whole and complete
• I am perfect just the way I am
• I am love
• I am loved
• I feel safe giving and receiving love

Notice how you feel during this exercise. Even if it is tough, keep conducting it once a day for 10 days. Then see how you feel on the eleventh day conducting it. I would venture to bet you feel more confident, more loving and more your true self.

How Do You Express Love

Often we are under the impression that our mates and family don’t love us because we are expecting the expression of their love to look a certain way. Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages, has determined that there are five ways people express love (and see Audrey’s review of the book here). They are: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. Your love language might not be the same as your mates. To start communicating with your loved ones with their language of love, first determine your love language and then discover what languages your family and mate speak. You can learn more about Gary’s book here. What you will become aware of is how much your family and friends do care and love you.

Trust and Be Vulnerable

How many times have you screamed at a movie screen and said, “Just tell her how you feel”? Most people don’t express their feelings or their truth because they feel unsafe being vulnerable. Today is your opportunity to take a chance and trust yourself to pick the right person to be you with. An exercise I always do is this: Ask your body to place you in a feeling and expression of trust and feeling safe being vulnerable.

What you are doing in this exercise is creating a new pattern in your body and you will start attracting circumstances that reflect this feeling of trust and safety in your everyday world.

There just isn’t one day to express your love or a season. It is up to you to create each moment of love within yourself.